


Replacement

by Princess_of_the_Pen



Series: Whumptober 2k19 [2]
Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: And waiting for the bomb to go off and finish him, Beaten nearly to death by Shiva with his own bo staff, Character Study, Day 2: Explosion, Gen, Hmmm.... beaten and then exploded..., Jason wouldn't wish this on his worse enemy, Tim Drake is Robin, Tim Drake is dying, Tim feels really guilty about this and a lot of stuff, Whumptober 2019, except the joker. The joker deserves it, sounds familiar?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-02
Updated: 2019-10-02
Packaged: 2020-11-22 06:41:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20869865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Princess_of_the_Pen/pseuds/Princess_of_the_Pen
Summary: Whumptober Day 2 - ExplosionSpecifically, Tim was thinking about how’d he managed to do it again. He’d managed to go out and get himself into the exact situation Jason had been in. Well, maybe not the exact same but the components were all there. A rogue (this time Shiva instead of the Joker), a blunt object (a bo staff - his bo staff - instead of a crowbar), and a ticking bomb announcing just how long Tim had left on this earth. Even if the situation that put him here was different, enough was the same that people would notice. People would notice, and people would compare. It was as if Tim was destined to always be exactly where Jason was, leaving Tim to follow too big footprints his feet couldn’t fill, and Jason without a place to be.





	Replacement

**Author's Note:**

> Whumptober Day 2: Explosion
> 
> My first time writing Tim as a major character and my first time even mentioning Jason in a fic. Hope I didn't butcher anyone.

_ This is what Jason experienced, _ Tim thought, and that was almost enough to make him laugh. Maybe he would’ve if he had the ability to, but his cracked ribs protested at the mere thought of it. Breathing by itself was a challenge, the bruised skin on his chest pulling with each stuttering inhale. He couldn’t laugh, could barely breathe, couldn’t get up and walk to safety. But he could think. Clear as day, his brain spoke to him through the fog of pain.

Jason Todd.

… Jason Todd-Wayne...

The Red Hood.

The second Robin.

His attempted murderer.

His technical brother.

How strange it was for Tim to think about the man - no. The boy. The damaged and traumatized boy - at a time like this. He was dying. He was dying and he knew it and for some reason he was thinking about Jason. He ought to be thinking about Dick, whom he always thought about since that fateful meeting oh-so-long ago. Not in a creepy way, but after so many years of being fascinated by him - first as an acrobat and then as Robin - it had simply become second nature for Tim to think about Dick.

Ok, so maybe it was a little creepy.

Creepy or not, it would’ve made sense for Tim to think of Dick as he laid there, broken and battered and slipping away. It would also have made sense for him to think of Bruce, whom he’d changed his entire life for. Or his parents. Or his millions of nannies that loved and cared for him. Basically, it would’ve made sense to think of anyone _ but _ Jason in his final moments and yet, that’s who his brain decided to fixate on.

Jason. Jason. Jason.

Specifically, Tim was thinking about how’d he managed to do it again. He’d managed to go out and get himself into the exact situation Jason had been in. Well, maybe not the _ exact _ same but the components were all there. A rogue (this time Shiva instead of the Joker), a blunt object (a bo staff - _ his _ bo staff - instead of a crowbar), and a ticking bomb announcing just how long Tim had left on this earth. Even if the situation that put him here was different, enough was the same that people would notice. People would notice, and people would compare. It was as if Tim was destined to always be exactly where Jason was, leaving Tim to follow too big footprints his feet couldn’t fill, and Jason without a place to be.

Tim would always be Jason’s replacement. Was it any wonder the older boy hated him?

  
  
The bomb made a loud beep and Tim wearily dragged his gaze to it’s flashing numbers.  
  
**01:00**

**00:59**

**00:58**

**00:57**

His final minute. Tim sighed in acceptance. He never expected anyone to come for him. Even if they realized he was gone, he’d left no clues about where he went or why. He didn’t want to face their reaction over him meeting up with Shiva, didn’t want to explain the insecurities that led to him seeking her out for more training. Even if they had found him, there was no way Tim could explain how his plea for training led to _ this_. He didn’t even understand it himself.

Tim’s body screamed as he heaved out a sob. He wasn’t scared. Or maybe he was and had simply forgotten what fear felt like. But he was upset. He was upset at himself, _ hated _ himself, for what he had done. He had ruined - or was going to ruin, in 45 seconds - the batfamily. Tim would become another Robin failed and Bruce would spiral into an even deeper abyss. He’d never take another Robin, not after this. He’d have no light and the Batman would fall, taking Gotham with him. And Dick. Dick Grayson, who had showed him so much kindness the day his world had fallen apart, who had saved Tim long before Robin was a thing. Is this really how Tim would thank him? By being another stain on his legacy, dying in his colors while bearing his name? By ruining Robin for Bruce _ and _ him? Tim knew Dick didn’t _ really _ want him as Robin. The man had given his blessing as a way to get rid of him. Tim knew it. But he had wanted to make Dick proud and this…

Tim had never been capable of making anyone proud.

And in a final act of selfishness, Tim would steal from Jason once more. First his title as Robin and now his title as the Dead Robin. Bruce would grieve _ him_, would probably put his suit in a glass case, and Jason would be… what? The Forgotten Robin? Another sob racked Tim’s frame and he could barely make out the timer through his tears - 30 seconds. Suddenly Tim found himself hoping with every fiber of his broken being that this would be the end for him. Please, let him stay dead. Don’t bring him back. Don’t take that event from Jason too. Let the boy keep something for himself.

Maybe with him gone, the boy could heal and become a man.

**00:20**

**00:19**

**00:18**

**00:17**

**00:16**

**00:15**

Tim closed his eyes and rested his head on the wall he was slumped against. His body quivered as more tears slipped out but he was calm with acceptance. Even though his heart continued to scream and plead for forgiveness, his brain was finally quiet. He was okay with dying. He hoped that Bruce and Dick and Jason would be okay too.

“TIM!”

Tim’s eyes slowly opened, his mind too foggy to make anything move quickly. The world was a blur around him but, through the room’s only window he could still make out a figure fast approaching. The sky was midnight blue, the moon was unrealistically big, and the figure would not have been noticeable if not for the bright red dome on his head.

The Red Hood.

_ Jason_.

**00:10**

**00:09**

**00:08**

**00:07**

All sense of calm and peace drained out of Tim’s body, leaving him cold and scared. He wanted to scream. _ No! Stay away! _ The timer was ticking, ticking, ticking and Jason was getting closer, closer, and closer. He would get caught in the explosion! He would die, _ again _ , an accident this time, and it would be all Tim’s fault! _ Please! Turn around! _ Why was he even here? How did he find him? Jason didn’t even like him! What type of sick joke-

“_ ’m sorry! _”

For a second Tim wasn’t sure where the words came from, wondered if another person had joined the “going to die” party. But then he became aware of his throat burning and he knew that he had said it. He wasn’t sure if Jason heard him, knew he probably hadn’t, but Tim still had to say it. Something had occurred to him in the few seconds it took for Tim to think his thoughts, something that made him feel like an awful person for all he had believed about Jason.

_ Maybe Jason wasn’t as lost as they thought _.

It was a strange thought and yet Tim couldn’t help but feel like he should’ve had it sooner. Jason hated him, that he was sure of. Jason hated him and yet here he was, somehow tracking him down and now risking his life to save him. Jason, who had tried to kill him multiple times. Jason. Trying to save _ him_.

The thought warmed him. Maybe, somehow, Jason had healed more than any of them knew. At least enough to not want Tim to suffer the same fate he had. Underneath all the trauma there was still something of the old Robin.

**00:03**

**00:02**

**00:01**

Jason was going to be okay.

Maybe all of them would be.

**00:00**


End file.
